Just breathe
by crescentdarnel
Summary: She had never seen Sirius look so wild, his hair tousled and his eyes full of disbelief, refusing to believe what was right in front of him. She had never seen Dumbledore look so hopeless, bending over James Potter's bloody, torn and lifeless body, frantically searching for a heartbeat, anything.
1. Chapter 1

So he hadn't changed. Arsehole.

She crunched her teeth when she saw the group move from the school ground. Stupid teenage boys, still breaking rules, but just that. Stupid boys.

Not him. He was head boy and he had said, _promised,_ that he wouldn't break any more rules. It was obvious it really meant nothing to him.

Well, she wasn't having it. Not caring that she was still in her nightgown, she slammed the window so loud she thought they would hear her. They didn't. She pulled a face at them, even though they couldn't see her.

She didn't bother with a jumper, rushing through the halls. For a fleeting second, she was scared that Filch or Mrs Norris would find her, but no one stopped her as she left the castle in the same direction as the faithless bastard. The lake was large on her left side, mirroring the full moon in the sky, but they were heading in a different direction.

The cold air came over her with full force as a cold wind hit her right in the face. She shivered, willing herself to ignore it like her chattering teeth.

Looking around, she panicked. It was dark, the forbidden forest in front of her and she couldn't locate them directly. Then she found them, crossing through only a small part of the forbidden forest toward her before stopping and staying right where they were.

Remus wasn't with them, obviously. He was much better than any of them. Peter being there surprised her a little, though. She thought he wasn't brave enough to go into the forbidden forest at night, especially after the Ministry announced precaution at Hogwarts. With Dumbledore as Headmaster, as well as a lot of vulnerable children people feared for, Hogwarts was an obvious target in this war.

Surprisingly, the boys just stood there, staring at their feet or something, not really talking. What were they doing?

No matter, she needed to tell all of them.

"Potter!" She screamed from afar, though she reached him within a few seconds, cursing the fact that she was out of breath. Potter, the idiot, turned around at the sound of her voice and his eyes widened when he saw her.

"Lily," he stammered, running his hand through his hair. Good, she thought, he was nervous. He should be. "Lily," he repeated. "What in Merlin's name are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question, you know." She crossed her hands in front of her chest, resting her case. "What happened to no rule-breaking because you are head boy?"

Potter went dangerously white, but Black interfered before he could speak. "OK, Evans, you made a show. You can tell James off later. Now _go._ "

Black hardly ever called Potter James. It was always some kind of nickname. Something was going on, she decided. Maybe something bigger than a prank.

"What is happening?" She was cautious with her question, not willing to back down. She was in the right, after all.

Black let out a groan. "Back _off,_ Evans. Now."

"No," she said, lifting her head up. "If Remus," Potter's head snapped around toward the forbidden forest and she frowned, momentarily distracted, before continuing, "Well, if Remus can make himself follow the rules, you should be able to, too."

Black barked a short laugh. "You have _no idea_ what is going on, do you, Evans?" She glared at him before focusing on Potter again. It was OK for Black to break the rules, he hadn't promised her that he wouldn't.

The cold wind was shifting through the trees and blew right into her face, making her shiver again. Potter instantly stretched out a hand toward her before retracting it. She raised her eyebrows at him before shivering even more. It was growing colder by the minute. Goosebumps had risen on her arms and she wrapped them around herself in an attempt to keep the cold away.

A low growl made the hair in the back of her neck stand. It was coming from the edge of the forest, and it grew louder. All three boys had turned their head toward the noise.

Black's gasp broke the silence and slowly the source of the growl stepped out of the forest.

The beast was gigantic, still growling. He was clearly seizing up the prey.

She had frozen up, but her brain was working in overdrive.

Full moon. _Full moon._ A fifth year Remus, fellow Prefect telling her his deepest secret she had already guessed. His best friends who, though they were all arseholes, always supported him.

A full moon.

The beast (she refused to think of him as Remus) was charging forward. Potter reacted first, pulling out his wand and sending a spell that seemed to momentarily confuse it, but then it was back, racing toward Potter. No spell could stop a werewolf.

"Lily!" Potter was screaming at her, his eyes finding her while racing toward the beast. "Lily! Run!"

She nodded dumbly, staring as Potter ran away from Hogwarts, leaving the werewolf chasing after him.

"Get help!" Black's eyes were wide and frantic. "We can't keep it back for long, get help! Get Dumbledore!"

Dumbledore. He was probably able to contain it, he had to.

She backed away from the forest, racing faster than she ever had, away from the terror in the making.

She ran through the halls, ignoring Mrs Norris who was standing in a deserted classroom, ignoring Peeves who was cackling to himself, just running until she reached Dumbledore's office. The gargoyle looked at her curiously. She could have slapped herself for having no idea what the password was.

"Please," she urged. "This is an emergency!"

The gargoyle shrugged. She huffed at him, irritated.

"Fine, don't know. Chocolate? Something sweet? Er...Butterbeer?"

The gargoyle nodded and proceeded to let her into the office. She thanked Merlin for obviously wanting to let the boys live a little longer.

She burst into the office. Slughorn as well as McGonagall were standing there with Dumbledore, staring at her in shock.

"Miss Evans?" McGonagall raised one eyebrow. "What on earth is the matter?"

She was breathing heavily, but still tried to speak the words. There was no time to lose.

"Remus," she gasped. "The beast – it's attacking. The beast, I don't know how it got out, but it's going to kill – it's going to kill."

Dumbledore had gone white during her speech. He was frowning.

"An attack," he said. "I suspected it would happen sooner or later. Come on. There's no time to lose."

He stretched out his arms, grabbing her and Slughorn. McGonagall reached out and took his shoulder and a second later the cold air of the lake surrounded them, the air colder than it had felt when she had first come out.

"There," she gasped, pointing toward the forest. The beast was nowhere to be seen, but she could see someone running.

Quickly, all four of them rushed toward the place. For a moment, she was worried all three boys had been killed, but then she saw Black's mop of black curls rush in their direction.

"James," he gasped. "He's tearing apart James – _Oh God..._ "

Dumbledore had moved before Black could say anything else, raising his wand. McGonagall immediately copied the motion and suddenly Lily could see the beast tearing away at something, then being torn off the human form and smashing into a tree, falling back unconscious.

For a moment, time froze.

Then Sirius started screaming.

It was a mindless scream, more of a howling. Dumbledore was running toward the thing the beast had bent over while it was still conscious.

It was Potter, only it wasn't Potter.

He was on his side, but that did nothing to hide that his chest had been torn open. All she could do was stare.

She had never seen Sirius look so wild, his hair tousled and his eyes full of disbelief, refusing to believe what was right in front of him. She had never seen Dumbledore look so hopeless, bending over James Potter's bloody, torn and _lifeless_ body, frantically searching for a heartbeat, _anything._

"St Mungo's," McGonagall said to Dumbledore in a strong voice. "I'll take him, you take care of them."

Dumbledore's shoulders sagged. "I think it might be too late for that," he whispered, but McGonagall shook her head, grabbing Potter's – James' – arm and vanished with a pop.

The beast didn't move in the whole time Dumbledore moved him. Neither did anyone else.


	2. Chapter 2

_Author's Note: None is mine, unfortunately. If it was, we'd have a Marauder's Map series on BBC. I have it all planned out in my head._

Lily had read hundreds of books in the medical field, as nearly every job at the Ministry of Magic required a certain training skill. Every one of them had warned about people going into shock. It didn't matter if they were the person injured or just an innocent bystander, shock was deadly, but it always had been the least of Lily's concerns. She had rather concentrated on the interesting texts about how to treat spell wounds and flesh wounds, as she deemed that a lot scarier than just the stupid shock.

Oh, how wrong she had been.

In that moment, as all the colour, no all _life,_ drained from Sirius Black's face, she noticed how powerful the shock was.

Sirius was, if she wanted to admit it or not, one of the most powerful people she knew. She had heard the stories about his family. At first she had scoffed at them. There must be a reason why Black was so spoiled, surely his family was wealthy and put him on the highest stool ever.

No such thing.

She had seen the encounters between him and his brother; him and his cousins. She had heard the story Andromeda, a girl who had been Head Girl when Lily was in First Year. She had seen her a few times after, with the Hufflepuff Head boy, having insults thrown at her head by various Black family members. That's when she had first admitted it, Sirius was strong.

And now not.

He fell to the ground, a mass of bones and muscle and meat, with no strength to hold it all together. He pressed his face into the ground, maybe smelling the soil, maybe feeling nothing at all.

Dumbledore was with him in an instant. "What is it, Sirius, are you hurt? Did he... did _it_ hurt you?"

Sirius stared up at Dumbledore with large, blank eyes. Behind him, Peter whimpered.

After quickly scanning both boys and Lily for injury and finding nothing, Dumbledore helped Sirius to his feet. He stumbled and Lily stretched out her hand to catch him, but he recoiled.

"Don't touch me."

The words were clear as day, the meaning clear. She took a deep breath and stepped back. Peter reached for her arm. She smiled at him weakly. He needed the support.

A young boy in his pyjamas saw them walk past. He gasped at the sight of Sirius' blood-trenched clothes.

 _James' Blood._

Dumbledore quietly told him to go back to his room. Peter grabbed her arm tighter.

Finally they reached the office. "Caramel Fudge," Dumbledore said to the gargoyle, who nooded respectfully.

In the office Sirius collapsed on a chair without Dumbledore's support. Peter let go of Lily's arm and sat down, too. Dumbledore nodded to another chair, but Lily shook her head. She couldn't find the strength.

Dumbledore sat down in the chair he had offered. It made a screeching sound as it scraped over the ground and Peter flinched, but Sirius didn't even look up.

Dumbledore cleared his throat. "I know this is not a good time, but I need to know what you were doing with Remus there. We have had a conversation like this before, you know that he is a werewolf, and, as you are all very good friends, I suspect you also know that today is the full moon."

Peter shuffled for an answer.

"We... we were bringing him there, like every full moon. We know there is not much to do, but we just like to let him know that he is not alone."

"Of course," Dumbledore said, nodding. "You, Lily?"

Lily looked up. She opened her mouth to give the reason, but it seemed so petty now. Why had she gone after them? She had known that tonight was the full moon, so why? She should have known that James would have a reason.

She shrugged helplessly, tears burning in her eyes.

Dumbledore leaned forward. "I brought... _it_ back into the Shrieking Shag. Someone had broken open the door."

For the first time, Slughorn spoke up. "Someone did this on purpose?"

Dumbledore nodded. "I suspect so. It was actually a really good idea. Open the shaft with the werewolf in, have a massacre when he gets into the school, and the headmaster who let him into the school is at fault. Easy. Causes terror in your own ranks, along with murder."

"Remus... is a _good person,_ " Lily rasped out. When did her throat get so dry?

"I have no doubt that Mr Lupin has an excellent character, Lily," Dumbledore said. "I just don't think he's that agreeable as a werewolf, but I also don't believe that's his fault. Indeed, he's kept a very optimistic attitude through it all. Other men have failed at it."

Lily nodded slowly, biting her lip hard. She should have known that Dumbledore didn't doubt Remus' character.

In that instant, the floo burned up, and Professor McGonagall stepped into the room.

For the first time, Sirius looked up.

McGonagall also had blood stains down her robe. For the first time, Lily became aware of just how much blood James had lost since the attack. In McGonagall's eyes there was a look of defeat, opposing to the stormy fight across her features.

Dumbledore got up. "Minerva, how is he?"

McGonagall smiled briefly. The look of defeat rested. "Not good. They checked him. They are keeping him alive."

Her bottom lip quivered and her voice shook as she spoke again.

"We should call in the Potter's. For last... goodbyes."

Dumbledore inhaled sharply. Slughorn fell back against the bookshelf in surprise. Peter sank forward. Sirius jumped up. All the life had suddenly returned to his eyes, but they didn't look like him. They didn't have the mischief spark in them, instead clouding over with something it took a minute for her to recognize.

Hate.

"This is your fault!" His voice was rising, accusation stapling every word. "Why did you have to come after us?"

He crossed the room until he was directly in front of Lily. "Why? We could have held it, but you... running for help, it wanted to follow you, it wanted you most."

Dumbledore stepped away from his desk. "Sirius, Lily is not at fault. It attacked James on his own accord -"

"Like hell! James threw himself in front of it, because it wanted to attack Lily, and he'd rather die than see that happen, how can you not see?"

McGonagall stepped in now. Lily wished she would let it go. "Now, Mr Black, I doubt that it was like that. I'm sure it was in accident. Besides, what reason would Mr Potter have to go into attack so blindly for a person he barely knows?"

Sirius' head dropped. His next words were barely audible. "Because he is in love with her."

"I'm sorry?"

His head whipped up. "Because he loves her more than life itself! All those years... all those detentions about harassing _Lily Evans,_ you telling him to just let this stupid joke go, and all the while he loved her! You may say this is not true, but then you don't know him, you haven't heard him go on and on about her for hours, never shutting up about her, never, even if he tried, getting even remotely attracted to another girl."

He closed his eyes and, as he reopened them, they were filled with desperation. "Did you know, _Lily,_ that he asked his mother for her engagement ring in _fucking first year?_ He told her that he had met the girl he loved and wanted to marry, and that he wanted to keep it, just in case the opportunity might arise? Even back then, for some reason, he wanted to spend his entire life with you. And you know what? He never grew out of it. He still wants you. And now he will die for you, just as he would have wanted it. His life for yours."

And just like that, Sirius was done. He dropped down to the floor, heaving in silent sobs.

McGonagall stood frozen, mid-step. Slughorn looked like his eyes were going to pop out of his head. Only Dumbledore didn't look surprised one bit. Peter looked more surprised by Sirius's sudden outburst.

Silent tears rolled down Lily's cheeks. She didn't know why. Maybe because now, she had proof that she had been too harsh when judging James Potter, and now it was too late. He was going to die.

"I'm sorry," she mouthed at Sirius, sinking down beside him.

"That's the worst thing," Sirius stated unhappily. "I can't even be mad at you. James wouldn't want it."

They stared at each other for a few more moments. Then Sirius cleared his throat.

"This sucks," he stated. Lily nodded.

And then, without knowing how exactly it happened, they were hugging.


	3. Chapter 3

_Author's Note: I own nothing. Also, I'm having problems responding to reviews, so nothing personal. Keep them coming._

They sat on the hard, uncomfortable chairs in front of the hospital wing for hours, waiting. A huge window was in front of them, through which they watched as the moon went down and the sun slowly rose in the milky-pink color that signaled a new morning.

Peter sat still, staring at the moving painting of a young maid the entire time. At first, she smiled and waved at him, and then she seemed to be getting a little uncomfortable with his insistent stare. Lily wished she could tell her not to worry. She doubted that Peter saw the maid.

Sirius alternated between rocking back and forward in his chair, restless, as if preparing to face off against an invisible enemy any moment now, then, in the next moment, heaving as sobs racked through his body. In those moments Lily held him, letting him cry into her hair, her nightgown, her lab, as he talked and cried and talked.

He told her that James was his family, all that he had. He told her bittersweet moments from his childhood with him, of how they had grown to be brothers instead of friends, how he was even accepted into James' actual family as a result of the failure that claimed to be his own family.

Most of all he talked about how James had talked about her. How he loved her, how he was desperate after the incident with Snape in their fifth year, how he had always wanted to apologize, but Lily had always pushed him away.

In those few hours, he gave Lily all the missing pieces of the puzzle that was James Potter, the pieces between the horrible git that she had seen over and over again and the side she had seen a few times, as he helped young students up, as he defended the stuffed animal of a young Hufflepuff that a couple of Slytherins had taken for their amusement. When he held her friend, Mary, as she was crying because her boyfriend broke up with her for not putting out, all those small moments he, for some reason, never wanted her to see.

Sometimes Sirius laughed through his sobs, when he hit a special memory, especially when it came to making fun of James's Obsessive Lily Disorder, as they had titled it in fourth year, but his usual joyful laughter was underlined with more tears pouring out of his eyes. Lily's own tears started falling into Sirius's hair, as she realized what an amazing man James Potter had become.

And now she would never know him.

Sirius told her that when James had skipped Head Duties three times a couple of months ago, it wasn't to go get drunk in Hogsmeade, although that was what he did. It was because his father had been killed on active Auror duty, and the last thing they had done was fight before James had returned to Hogwarts. He also told her that the bruises on his chest weren't from a pointless fight or prank, but self-induced.

James had been doing much better the next morning, even, amazingly, grief-wise, after Lily had screamed at him for neglecting his duty. Sirius chuckled at this. He said that it was because Lily made him happy, in any state.

Madam Pomfrey came out at about six o'clock, smiling at them pitifully.

"I think you have waited enough now," she said. "Be careful with him, he has just woken up and... well, he has puzzled some things together, so he's not in a very good state. I treated his chest wounds, but you know how it is with this kind of wounds."

Sirius and Lily scrambled up immediately, Peter took a second to realize what was going on, but sooner rather than later they were all standing at the entrance of the hospital wing, which wrung a small smile from Madam Pomfrey's lips.

"Dumbledore will probably want to see him later today," she added. "And you have lessons, I'm sure."

"Bugger those," Sirius muttered.

Madam Pomfrey narrowed her eyes at him, but moved to let them past. Sirius rushed in immediately, but Lily was a little more apprehensive. What were they facing in there?

She walked in slowly and followed Sirius behind the curtain. Peter was slumping behind her, probably with somewhat a similar train of thoughts.

Remus was sitting up in his bed, but barely. Several scratches and bruises were all over his face and neck. He was shirtless, but a huge bandage covered him like a robe would. He looked at them and the light bleary-eyed, his brows wrinkled in confusion.

"Sirius?" His voice was barely a croak, addressing Sirius, who was now standing directly next to the bed.

"Hey, mate," Sirius whispered. To Lily's relief, there was no fear or even disgust or hate in his gaze, only the familiar mixture of trust and brotherly love.

"Sirius?" Remus was speaking again, his voice was getting stronger. "Sirius, did I... did I hurt someone? I can taste blood, but it's not mine, I know mine, and this is..." He trailed of, looking around, then again, suddenly urgent. "Sirius, where is James?"

"Remus -"

 _"_ _Sirius, where is James?"_

"He – you, and he-"

"No. No. No. No, no, no, no, NO!" Remus was staring at Sirius, desperation mixing with helpless hope in his expression. "Please Sirius, tell me I did not kill my best friend."

"You did not kill your best friend," Lily answered for Sirius, speaking up for the first time. "He's still alive, Remus, but... barely."

With a surprisingly wolf-like howl, Remus sank back and pulled his hands before his face, before looking at Sirius, etching into madness. "Why? I mean, why James? Why couldn't I have killed _me_ in my lust for blood?"

Sirius mumbled something in the general direction of Remus, who in response sat up straighter.

"Sorry?"

"Not your fault, Mooney." Remus scoffed and opened his mouth, but Sirius cut him off. "Dumbledore invested, someone opened the door of the Shrieking Shag, letting you – letting that thing out. He thinks it was a planned attack on the Hogwarts School."

"That's what I am, right? A freaking danger to the entire school. That's what they'll say: Thank Merlin that werewolf Remus only killed _his best friend_ during full moon!"

"Oh, shut up, Remus! It's not your fault, and that's what he'd say if he were here right now!"

"Err-" Peter spoke up for the first time since they had entered the curtained corner. "Err – I think Dumbledore wants a word with Remus."

They all turned to see Dumbledore standing in the small entrance, smiling, but his usual twinkle gone. "Mr Pettigrew is right. Would you give me and Mr Lupin a moment of privacy?"

Sirius opened his mouth, probably to protest, but Lily nudged him, making him notice the nodding Remus. At this, Sirius bowed his head and followed Peter out. Lily made a move to follow them, only stopped by a hand on her elbow. Dumbledore held it with a surprising urgency.

"It's not your fault either, Miss Evans."

"I'm sorry, Professor?"

"I know what you're thinking, but it is _not your fault._ I'm telling you now, but it is true. I know you blame yourself, or will, sometime in the near future but it is also not your fault."

"Al – Alright, Professor."

The dark eyes behind the shiny spectacles twinkled once. "Go on, now. They need you."

She nodded, stumbling out and seeing Peter sitting on one of those stupid chairs again, staring back up at the picture. Sirius was slumped against the wall.

She dropped next to him and stared with him at the pale sun, rising higher and higher. After a while, Sirius's eyes dropped shut, but he reopened them quickly. Lily turned to look at him.

"You know, you are allowed to sleep," she told him.

"Yeah, I know," he answered slowly. His tired eyes drifted over her face, unfocused. "But every minute, every second, might be James's last. I don't want to miss the last moment of his life, even if I'm not by his side when it happens."

Lily nodded. She didn't understand completely, never having shared such a bond with any other person, including her own sister, but she knew of it through the Marauders. Now, though she was tired, she didn't want to sleep either. She didn't want to miss the last minutes of James's life, either.

Sirius bent forward, cupping her face in his hands, smiling tiredly. "You know, you're allowed to sleep," he said. She huffed and he shook his head. "No, I'm serious. I'm sure James wouldn't be offended."

"I'm staying awake," she responded.

Peter fell asleep a few minutes later. Lily was sure he didn't mean to, because he kept turning his head and rubbing his eyes, but from one minute to the next, he was snoring. She couldn't really blame him, it was what she really wanted to do now, too.

Dumbledore stepped out of the hospital wing finally, after what felt like hours and hours but were probably just a few minutes. He gave a quick smile at the sleeping Peter before turning to Sirius and Lily, both hastily rising.

"Several Aurors of the Ministry will be arriving soon," he said. "I called them in, I'd like the Shrieking Shag inspected. Remus will probably be questioned. But, don't worry," he added quickly as he noted their expressions. "Nothing will happen to him. He's under my power. Remus is a good boy, I know that." He carefully smoothed out the edges of his robe, not looking at either of them. "As of Mr Potter, well... the Healers said family only. Mr Black, I know of your bond with Mr Potter, but you're still technically not family, so, I'm sorry."

Sirius nodded. He had probably known this already and accepted that fate.

"That's alright," he added anyway. "His mom will take good care of him-" He fell silent. Lily knew why. Mrs Potter was losing her only son, her only child, only a few months after losing her husband.

"Yes, well." Dumbledore cleared his throat. "I'm sure she – handles it well, considering the circumstances."

Sirius nodded again. Lily too, for the lack of knowing what to do in such a situation.

"Good. You two and Mr Pettigrew are excused from all lessons today, considering the circumstances, but I must advice you to at least eat some lunch."

Then he left them, with a swish of his robe, and Sirius slumped against the wall again.

Eventually, they were forced to go to lunch by both Madam Pomfrey and Remus. She urged them to go eat (Sirius did look quite bad already, she was probably right) and Remus asked them because he really couldn't stand that they spent the entire time staring at the sun through the window. Eventually, they gave in. It was obviously the best thing to do. Also, Dumbledore would know if they didn't go.

When Lily slipped into her usual seat, Marlene looked up. "Oh, Lily!" She slipped one arm around her and eyed her outfit, still her nightgown with her robe over it. "Where have you been? You would have told me if you were ill, and you never skip class. I was worried!" She looked up once again as Sirius slipped in next to Lily. He shot her a questioning look and she nodded. A little relief shone over his otherwise blank expression. Peter climbed onto the bench, too, both boys grabbing some food. Sirius stared at it and then pushed it away.

"Could I please have your attention for a moment?" Dumbledore had stood up from his usual seat, knocking his glass onto the wood for a second before he had everyone's attention. Students everywhere quieted down. "Good, thank you." His voice, obviously magically transformed, reached even the last corner in the Great Hall.

"As many of you have probably not noticed, several students have been missing from the classes of Year Seven this morning, including both Head Boy and Head Girl, so I'm sure at least someone must have wondered."

He took a deep breath. Lily could see him exhaling, could nearly feel it on her cheek. Marlene turned to look at her once more, but she wasn't the only one. Several heads turned into her direction.

"You all know that I always try to be as honest as possible with all of you. There is no way keeping you in the dark would help any of you, but today, it is harder than usually."

Another deep breath.

"Yesterday night, there was an attack on Hogwarts, launched probably by one of Voldemord's followers."

Silence. Absolute Silence. Generally, even during Dumbledore's speeches, there were always a couple of people talking, generally Slytherins, making a show of their disrespect to the current Headmaster, but now he had grabbed even their attention.

He continued: "There was only one casualty."

Sirius's head fell forward, onto the wooden surface of the table. Dumbledore continued, but by the way his eyes flickered to Sirius for a split second Lily knew that he had seen or heard him.

"There would have been a lot more deaths if this student hadn't bravely taken on the battle. It this student wasn't dying now, breathing his last breaths.

"The only casualty was James Potter."

There was still no noise. Every single pair of eyes was fixed on Dumbledore.

"He's not dead yet, but it won't be long. He managed to fight off the... imposter. Many of you owe him your life." His eyes drifted to Lily. "But let us mourn the dead when they are dead, but please, keep Mr Potter in your thoughts, especially tonight. Thank you. You may continue with your meal."

Dumbledore quietly raised his glass toward the ceiling, a silent toast, before slowly sipping. It was so quiet that Lily could hear him swallow.

Then Sirius started screaming again, like he did when James was first injured, a scream of complete agony. Several people gasped. Lily turned, pulling him into her arms again, cradling his head, sharing his grief the best she could.

A few hundred miles away, a young man was dying, his mother clutching his hand desperately, as if she could hold on to him while he slipped away.

He exhaled, his body growing slack, his hazel eyes closing.

A word fell from his lips, a name.

 _Lily._


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry about this, this isn't a chapter. I was actually planning on having the story done by now, but life got in the way.

As you might or might not know, November is National Novel Writing Month, which means that I'll be working on one of my own projects for the entire November. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten or abandoned this story, and if you are also doing NaNoWriMo, I'm sure you understand. Thank you for all your ongoing support.

(also, if you want to add me as a NaNoWriMo writing buddie, find me at emilyhaworth. Just saying.)


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